It’s a good thing The Bachelor producers decided to give us a glimpse “behind the scenes” because how else would we understand that the tears continue long after rejection. The night began with Chris Harrison and Juan Pablo crashing The Bachelor viewing parties because CH has made this a new requirement in his contract so he can legally act like a creep among women more than 20 years his junior. The way that Juan Pablo was acting made it clear that he thought that these were the women he was choosing from. He was hugging and chatting with all of them like he was trying to get to know them. Side note: Why the heck isn’t MY viewing party being crashed? I clearly deserve to be interviewed about this asinine show.
Chris Harrison and J Pabs have a heart-to-heart talk and *SPOILER ALERT* tell us that he chose Clare for the first one-on-one date. Talk about rude. I hope you weren’t expecting to be hearing that for the first time tonight via cheesy poem on a card like I was.
Apparently the one-on-one date will be a Winter Wonderland of sorts with fake snow and everything. They were kind enough to let Juan and his daughter, Camilla, play in the fake snow before his actual date. Pabs was super eloquent when describing how excited Camilla was about this: “She grab the snow and then she hold it and then she run back running like flying.” They went ice skating, built snowmen, and sweat profusely because they were overdressed. Apparently, the producers we’re more concerned with Camilla getting the whole experience, so they chose to risk over-heating her in the LA sun by dressing her in a winter coat, scarf, gloves, and a hat.
We got a glimpse into the remaining 18 women and their excitement upon arrival to the mansion. One gal even went so far to say “I’m living in this mansion now, and cooking in this kitchen, and my bed is upstairs.” Congratulations, you understand the definition of a home. You forgot to add “And peeing in this bathroom.”
In hopes to embarrass the rejected women even more, they chose to “keep the cameras rolling” after they didn’t receive a rose from Juan Pablo. Some of the ladies were still crying the following morning, which is downright disgusting, because now you’re sober and you can’t blame your tears on the wine. One girl was acting like she was talking to her therapist the way she was laying on the bed spilling her guts.
Sean and Catherine talked to Juan Pablo about how Catherine massages him. J Pabs said he got a lot of advice and tips from them but I’m not sure where the advice was in “I get a lot of massages.” Side note: Their wedding is supposedly this month. Isn’t this being aired because they’re huge attention whores? When is it? I NEED TO KNOW.
We then heard everyone’s sob stories and I don’t even have the energy to discuss this because it was so boring. This was definitely a mistake to do two episodes a week because everything is repeated 40 times and not even interesting. FAIL.
The good news is that Juan Pablo is already whoring himself out tonight. Stay tuned!