Absolutely Asinine Commercials: Cottonelle

It’s our second installment of Absolutely Asinine Commercials. Last month (yikes – I had planned to do this weekly) we discussed Capzasin HP and the pickle lover. Today, let’s take a look at Cottonelle.

You’re probably familiar with the commercials where the British blonde, “Cherry,” invades everyone’s privacy and greets them at the bathroom door right after they’ve dropped a deuce in a public restroom.

I’m a Scott gal, so my opinion may be biased, but what in the ever loving hell were they thinking with these commercials? First of all, how does Cherry know who’s shitting and who is just relieving themselves with a tinkle? Secondly, ain’t no public bathroom I’ve ever been in have anything softer than tissue paper.

And finally, the most outrageous point of all that no one seems to care about…

Cherry is constantly asking these people “Are you clean enough to go commando?” Look, I don’t care what I’m using to wipe my ass, but you better believe that no matter what, I’d be clean enough to go commando. It’s as though she’s expecting a few people with hygiene issues who are going to politely decline, in fear of a skid mark. Who is not wiping themselves enough and are leaving feces in their butt cracks, thinking eh, I’m wearing underwear so I can just leave it at that!?

Toilet Paper Natalie Dee

So disturbing.


3 thoughts on “Absolutely Asinine Commercials: Cottonelle

  1. I can’t imagine someone being so desperate to be in a commercial to say yes, even to a Brit was a fancy accent. Sorry lady, I’ve got to get back to whatever it is that I was in a hurry to when you interrupted me. And stop thinking we want to see that one on TV.

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